If you would rather listen to this week’s newsletter, I’ve provided an audio recording.
Our Independence Day Celebration Turned to Grieving
With summer well underway, Americans were celebrating our country’s 249th birthday last weekend when tragedy struck Kerr County, Texas. Initial reports said 850 people were rescued while 50 had died and many more were missing when the Guadalupe River flooded after heavy rains overwhelmed the river’s shoreline. More recent reports say Texas has lost 104 while search and rescue efforts continue.
But I’m not interested in focusing on the number of deaths or the news reports that point fingers and blame everyone from the president to the tourists and residents themselves. Whenever natural disasters strike, we want to make sense of it, and the knee jerk reaction from those not involved in the tragedy seems to be to find fault and place blame.
Maybe people feel better if they can find fault, maybe it eases some feelings of collective guilt, that it didn’t happen to us or our family, or maybe some people are just petty and have nothing better to do. All I know is that is not how the people of Texas responded. No, they rallied and helped their fellow man. From their Governor, Senators, Representatives, firefighters, police to teenage camp counselors, all their efforts were focused on saving lives and comforting those who lost loved ones.
I lived in the great state of Texas for many years. I met and married the love of my life there while I was stationed at Lackland AFB in San Antonio, Texas. It was heavenly to me. Everything was big and bold in Texas. The people were friendly, and I loved the food.
I still have friends living in Texas and my little brother, whom I met through the Big Brothers Big Sisters of America organization, recently reconnected with me and he still lives in San Antonio. So, you can understand why Texas holds a special place in my heart and I’m saddened by this loss of life yet still hopeful they will find more survivors.
I think it’s important we turn our focus away from the news reports and find ways we can help.
On July 6th KUT 90.5 Radio in Austin, Texas, provided these suggestions to help the people affected by the Kerrville area floods…
The Red Cross
The American Red Cross Serving Central and South Texas has opened shelters in the affected areas. Visit RedCross.org/donate and select “Your Local Red Cross” or Disaster Relief as a donation option. You can also call 1-800-HELP NOW (1-800-435-7669) to donate over the phone.
The Salvation Army
The Salvation Army Texas’ mobile kitchen is providing meals and hydration to those affected by the floods in Kerrville. You can support their work by donating at HelpSalvationArmy.org or by calling 1-800-SAL-ARMY.
You can visit Volunteer.SalvationArmyTexas.org for current volunteer opportunities. The Salvation Army Kroc Center in Kerrville is coordinating donations of nonperishable goods, personal hygiene items, diapers, baby wipes and trash bags, among other items, at 855 Hays St. The center, which is posting regular updates on its Instagram account, is also accepting donations.
Kerr County Flood Relief Fund
The Community Foundation of the Texas Hill Country has started the Kerr County Flood Relief Fund to help vetted organizations that are providing rescue, recovery and relief efforts, the nonprofit says. The organization’s website says the fund will support the communities of Hunt, Ingram, Kerrville, Center Point and Comfort. Visit CommunityFoundation.net for more details.
Austin Pets Alive!
The Austin animal shelter has a team in Kerrville providing medical care and transporting animals to its shelter. APA, which says it has taken in more than 50 pets from flooded areas in Kerr and Williamson counties, is looking for help with fosters, volunteers and donations. Visit AustinPetsAlive.org for more details.
World Central Kitchen
The nonprofit, founded by chef José Andrés, has a team on the ground in Kerrville providing food and water relief. Visit WCK.org for details on making a donation and to follow for updates. On Friday, volunteers said they were providing meals to stranded campers at Camp La Junta.
Junior League of Austin
The nonprofit charitable organization said on its Facebook page Saturday that it far exceeded the number of physical donations it expected to receive and was no longer accepting donations at its Community Impact Center at 5330 Bluffstone Lane in Austin.
Follow the Junior League of Austin on its social media pages for updates on donations of physical goods.
TEXSAR
The group, a nonprofit first responder organization that helps with disaster response, has a $250,000 fundraising goal. Visit TEXSAR.org for details on how to donate and for updates on the group’s mission.
GoFundMe
The popular crowdfunding website has a list of verified fundraisers for Kerrville-area flood victims. GoFundMe says it will add to the list as it's able to verify requests. Under “Texas flood relief,” you can search for fundraisers by location.
Governor Abbott declared Sunday, July 6th, a day of prayer for the state of Texas. Many families have lost their children, grandchildren, aunts, uncles, parents, and friends. Hearts are broken. Often those of us not directly impacted by the tragedy feel at a loss as to how to help. Donations are certainly helpful and can go a long way in helping people recover, but not everyone can afford to contribute and that’s ok. Prayer helps in ways money cannot.
Samaritan’s Purse is also helping and their website says…
Our volunteer teams started work on Tuesday morning, July 8. Volunteers serve as the hands and feet of our Lord, helping homeowners with property cleanup and mud-outs. In all we do, we aim to share the Good News of Jesus Christ with hurting people. Our host church for this response is Kerrville Bible Church at 898 Harper Rd. A Disaster Relief Unit and support equipment, which deployed from our Southwest Ministry Center in north Texas, are stationed there. Check out spvolunteer.org for the latest information and to sign up to assist.
Today, July 9th, Fox Weather reports…
At least 119 people have been killed, and more than 160 remain missing. In hard-hit Kerr County, at least 95 deaths have been reported, including 36 children. Five girls and one counselor remain missing from Camp Mystic.
These people in Texas will need our thoughts and prayers long after the news reports fade. Understanding tragedy is impossible but the power of prayer can heal the wounds tragedy brings. God Bless Texas!
Remember Grieving Does NOT Have a Time Limit!
If you have family or friends who have lost a loved one, it’s important to realize that grieving doesn’t come with a clock or have a time limit. For some who grieve, time stands still or slows to a painfully slow pace. For others time may slip through their fingers but no matter, time is what they must get through so please be patient and kind.
Here are some suggestions to help you help your loved one who is grieving…
Be Present - Just show up, it’s ok to sit in silence
Listen - Let them share what they want to share
Acknowledge Their Loss - Say their loved one’s name, include them in conversation
Offer Specific Help - Can I bring you dinner tomorrow evening?
When You Don’t Know What to Say - Speak from the heart and it’s ok to say you don’t know what to say
Check In - Beyond the funeral, after family and friends have gone home
Give Them the Time & Space to Grieve - Grief comes in waves, understand their emotions whether it’s tears, anger, or laughter
Encourage Self-Care - It’s important they rest, eat, and hydrate, and seek help if needed
Include Them - Offer to meet for coffee or lunch but understand if they say, no
Send a Card or Thoughtful Message - even weeks or months later
Thank you for allowing me the time to focus on grieving and loss after this tragic natural disaster in Texas. Life is short. Reach out to your peeps and tell them how much you love them, hug the ones close by and get out to visit the ones who are not. When you do lose someone, and you will, give yourself the grace and time to mourn their loss and grieve as YOU need to grieve.
More to come on achieving and maintaining MonuMENTAL Health.
Thank you for reading my weekly newsletter. If you’d like to help me advocate for MonuMENTAL Health for all and help me rid our culture of eating disorders, please share this newsletter with one other person each week. Thank You!
I want to know what you think, what questions you have. Do you have questions about loss and grieving? What mental health topics do you want to know more about? If you are a “Substacker” you can share your thoughts by clicking on the leave a comment button, below. If not, you can email me at sherry@drsherryboles.com.
Tonight, when your family gathers for dinner, remember no phones at the table, ask everyone to share their favorite family story and send up a prayer for the people of Texas who have someone missing at their table tonight. Everyone eats, participates, and listens to each other’s stories.
Well written with helpful advice on lending a helping hand and encouragement rather than placing blame. Prayers for Kerrville
They don’t need Pratt’s much as they need science and a purge of greed